Sunday, May 8, 2011

celebrating the mom in all of us.

me holding a friend's baby


Whether or not a baby has ever miraculously come out of your body, you are a mother. You have helped mother me, or your sister, or your girlfriend, or your cousin, or your neighbor, or a stranger. You have wiped a tear or a bottom. You have given counsel. You have talked someone you love off a ledge. You have nurtured and natured and gently nudged her to keep going when she was sure she couldn't. You have read a storybook, shoveled a walk, waved across the parking lot, not even realizing you were saving someone's life. – jena strong

This quote was shared on twitter last year, and I can't tell you how much it was appreciated. Sometimes I downplay my feelings around trying to become a Mom. Sometimes I forget that I already am, all of the things that any Mom is.

Today I am celebrating all women, and the divine feminine that lives in each of us. Today I celebrate and send love to ~

Moms with babies.

Moms who have lost babies.

Moms to be.

Women hoping to be Moms.

Women who choose not to be Moms.

Women who cannot conceive naturally.

Women who are struggling with (in)fertility.

Women who are Moms to fur babies.

Women who are nurturers.

Women who are friends.

Women who listen.

Women who are willing to be by your side, any day, any way.

Women whose memories live on.

Women who are sisters, friends, aunts, cousins, daughters.

Women who reach out.

Women who show up when you need someone.

Mother's Day can bring up a lot of emotion for many of us. Whether it's because we don't have children, we've lost a child, or because we are missing our Mothers. One thing that I have found is that those of us that are feeling emotion on this day often get ignored. I totally get that it can be because someone doesn't want to upset me (you), I understand that someone may worry that they will say the wrong thing, or that they don't know how to bring up a sensitive subject. For me...being ignored feels worse. I would rather you acknowledge my feelings (even if it comes out all wrong). This is where I'm at with all of it - you can acknowledge someones feelings without diminishing them or trying to fix things for them.

For example ~

I know you may be feeling tender about _____(or today), I just want you to  know I'm thinking about you.

It's really simple to just let someone know you are thinking about them. Not so simple to leave it at that...but it's all that's needed. I promise. And it applies to any situation. Of course everyone is not the same...some people may want a hug, some may not. Some may want to talk, or they may not. But by acknowledging them, you have showed up in such big way. Maybe even bigger than you know.

For me, it lets me know you are thinking of me, and the fact that I might be feeling tender. It makes me feel like a person, a whole person. I don't feel invisible, or like the damsel in the tower who is separated from everyone else, by a moat and dragon. I say just show up...don't worry about how perfectly you say things, or that you might cause someone more pain. We are going to have our feelings either way. When no one shows up...we are just having them alone.

I cannot adequately express the power of this in words. I'm pretty sure that we have all had women in our lives at some point or another, that were a rock for us, a source of inspiration...They may or may not have been our own Mothers. In fact, they may not have ever had children themselves. But they showed up for us in big ways, out of love. This is worth celebrating today, and every day.

Thank you to the women in my life who show up. I am so appreciative!



8 comments:

  1. i honor your words here and thank you for the reminder. xo

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  2. A beautiful heartfelt post from a beautiful mothering soul. You are a giver of life and light because wherever you go, with your honest words and your kindness, you plant seeds...You help us to grow, to light up, and to thrive.

    I hear you, I see you, I love you.
    Keep on shining your bright light and continue to guide us with your honest heart.

    Danielle xoxo

    PS. You look absolutely gorgeous in that photo. Total cover girl.

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  3. Sending you lots of love today. You have such a big heart. Thank you for your honesty and willingness to share.

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  4. All of this is sooooooo well said. Thank you. Happy Mother's Day:)

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  5. thank you girls! thank you for showing up, and for leaving your thoughts for me. It was a fantastic day...I loved celebrating the mother in all of us today. I look at the picture (it was taken 7 years ago or so)...and I miss that hair! and the youthfulness ;)Hope everyone had a beautiful day.

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  6. lovely lovely you! i am SO thankful for you and your big heart!! for our friendship and for showing up and sharing these words today even though i am a tad late reading them. but, well, you know i got you on the other line :) xo

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  7. This is stunning, chica. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and inspiration. Your light just keeps getting brighter and brighter - gorgeous to behold!

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  8. Thank you for this. I needed to read it today.

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you are lovely. thanks for taking the time to comment.